#63. The new nose pick.

Like cancer and bigger breasts, a new trend has sneaked into social biology; Mouth Yogurt.  This unwanted accumulation of saliva in the corner of one’s mouth is the catalyst of a new type of socially unacceptable pruning.  Upon realizing their condition, a typical victim may opt to rectify this oral intrusion by maneuvering the thumb and forefinger of their right hand into a ‘V’, pursing their mouth into an ‘O’ shape, raising the aforementioned fingers to their lips, and generously swabbing at this rogue saliva cum marshmallow matter.  This action is one of the most unabashed, unsanitary, and ignored forms of public nastiness.  Like picking your nose, it will be phased out and ostracized, as it should be.

Please, do not misunderstand.  The picking of a nose is one of the great pleasures in life.  It just happens to be that finger fits so snugly into nostril?  Right…  So to, removing scum from mouth is vital, but both can be executed in a discreet matter.  Use a tissue.  Use a napkin.  Excuse yourself from the circle. No matter how you discreetly remove this foamy yum, you will save your friends from contracting whatever you have, as well as save face.


2 thoughts on “#63. The new nose pick.

  1. My new favorite blog. OMG I am LMAO! I was on the city bus today and a lady was vigorously complaining about another passenger in Spanish. I understand some Spanish and understood her complaint, but I was quickly lured into gawking at the piece of food that dropped from her mouth onto her lip. The food then rolled onto her chin where it held on for life. I felt a little sick to my stomach from the sight of it and I feel the same about ‘Mouth Yogurt’…

    I am adding you to my Blogroll! Keep in touch!

    Seriously M.

  2. I absolutely love this whole blog. Useful advice, saves us women from becoming our man’s mother. Luckily I’m not a guy, so I don’t have to worry about most of these common mistakes. Even so, I have been guilty of a couple of them. 🙂
    No more undershirts to the grocery store.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s